The Boys Next Adventure

As I look over the forgotten papers in the "to do" box, amongst school papers, co-payments, receipts, bank statements, small paper memories...I find the most important stack; cards from Cole and Noah for various occasions but mostly just for fun. Words like "I will always love you, you are the best brother/mama/daddy ever, I love you so much." I hold them dear as reminders that we absolutely do love each other no matter what. We fight, brothers call names and hurt each other, we cry but we always make up and under it all we are there for each other. I pray that 2012 holds more hugs, more smiles, more laughter, more fun, and more love than we ever thought possible.

Noah got his haircut yesterday and he looked in the mirror and said, "Someone's gonna marry me someday!" He melted my heart. I also pray that both of our boys realize they are loved just because they are. We have so enjoyed watching them grow and sharing that with all of you. This will be our last post for this blog. We will start another blog soon with a new format. They are both in school now but we will always treasure their "little boy wisdom." Thank you for caring and for following our blog. We love you all.

Little Boy Wisdom # 77: Make homemade cards, call, text, facebook, shout it from the rooftop, but no matter what, tell those you cherish how much you love them as often as possible.

C is for Cookie...and Cole!

 Today was our 6th annual cookie day with our adoptive family friends! As we made the cookies, I asked Kevin to get some tinfoil so we could store the cookies in a tupperware container. Cole overheard and said...I was just going to EAT them all, we don't need a box.

Here is Noah's angel, complete with a gumdrop halo on top. Right after the cookies the kids chose to run outside and play in the snow. They are rarely phased by cold temperatures.

Little Boy Wisdom #76: Eat your cookies while they are still warm. Go sledding as soon as the snow falls. Life is short, seize the day!

You're Braver Than You Think

Today was Cole's first day of Kindergarten. It was Noah's 2nd day of 3rd grade. Parents are not allowed to drop their children off at the classroom, but Cole was lucky enough to be escorted by his big brother. As they left me, Cole was crying and holding Noah's hand. Another teacher told me later that they were very sweet, with Noah telling him as they walked to the room, "Kindergarten is really fun Cole, I promise. You're going to love it!" At the end of the day Cole came to me with a big smile! Both boys think school is great so far. Still, as Cole fell asleep he kept saying, "scared...scared...scared." He said the same thing last night, but I know tomorrow he'll champion through and come back smiling. We once read a Franklin (the turtle) book about how being brave doesn't mean you can't be scared at the same time. Cole has always liked that book. Now he gets to live it.

Little Boy Wisdom #75: There are some things in life we just have to do. Go ahead, be brave, despite your fears.

The Tao of Cole

Tonight at dinner I was talking about our dream place to live, California. A fellow teacher at my school just moved here from San Diego. She told me that there are no teaching jobs open in California anywhere. To which Cole chimed in, "That's great! Then you wouldn't have to work!"

Little Boy Wisdom #74: Don't worry so much. It'll all work out for the best.

Some pictures of Sir Cole and Sir Noah at the Minnesota Renaissance Festival (their dream place to live). Thanks for joining us Nana, Boomie and Papa! Huzzah!

Compassion Fills the Space

Gale Woods Farm, Three Rivers Park District, Minnetrista, Minnesota

In first grade, Noah's teacher gave him the title of "star student" for one week. Not because he cleaned up or received a good grade, it was because he chose to be a friend to a boy who was new. He helped the boy feel welcome and made him belong.

This year I was looking over the list of his classmates (a benefit of working at his school) and he saw my expression change when I saw a particular boy's name on the list. He asked me "what's wrong?" I said, "Oh nothing, this boy...well I had some trouble with him last year in my class." Noah pressed further, "Is he really bad?" I explained, "I don't think he's 'bad,' I really don't. I think he just needs someone to show him he's cared about." Noah got a very serious look on his face and replied, "I will fill that space." Beautiful words from one so young.

We all feel a space somewhere in our hearts. A space that can only be filled by compassion. Maybe we can't always fill it completely. Sometimes we just have to work around it and accept the space that will live in us. But I believe, by giving and receiving compassion, we can make the space feel much smaller. In some cases, we might even help it to disappear as it fills with kindness and a sense of peace.

Little Boy Wisdom #73: By allowing ourselves to give or receive compassion, we can fill the space in our hearts.

Happiness and Pride

Last week we were at Korean Culture Camp for the first time. It was wonderful! The boys were so happy to go everyday. I was amazed to see the transformation in the boys attitude. They went from just being okay with being Korean to complete pride and excitement. Each day they had classes on language, history, music, art, self esteem, and tae kwon do. At the end of the week they participated in a performance with 300 plus Korean children. They were so sad when it was over, Cole said, "Noah, we have to wait a long, long time until the next one." Each night when he wanted to go to bed early so the morning would come faster. Let's hope they can be as excited when school begins this fall. :)

Little Boy Wisdom #72: Go to bed early and look forward to a new day! You just might learn something new.

Right Now

Every night after we say our prayers at dinner, we all say what our favorite parts of the day were. Typical answers from the boys are about playing with someone or finding a bug or going biking. But the most common answer is part of this story.

Last weekend, our family went to Stillwater for my parents' 50th wedding anniversary. After a lovely boat ride with dinner, we went to a candy store on Main Street just for fun. As Noah finished picking out his goodies with Kevin, Cole and I sat on the bench outside. Cole cuddled up to me and reminded me that we had not said our prayers at dinner. So we quietly sang them to each other. Then he said, "My favorite part is right now."

That's what I hear the most..."right now eating pancakes" or "right now laughing with you" Sometimes I think they are just picking an easy out, but that night I realized something very important. Children, really do live for the moment. That's why being told to wait for something feels like an eternity to them. Every moment matters. If only we all could live more like that and not take one moment for granted.

Little Boy Wisdom #71: Make this moment the best part of your day...right now.

Preschool Graduation Wisdom

Here's our boy, all grown up! He graduated from preschool yesterday! Starting kindergarten this fall at Northpoint. Then for 1st grade he will go with Noah to Sejong Academy, the Korean immersion school opening in Minneapolis in 2012.

Cole learned a lot this year but he taught us a lot too. Here is a list of the top 10 things that made him happy in preschool:

1. Say the word "beautiful" often.
2. Notice the colors of the "beautiful" sunrise ("blue, violet, pinkish")
3. Paint "one pretty place." Include a rainbow, flowers, and a butterfly (especially in the winter when we don't see those things).
4. Make lots of lists. (flowers to plant, things to do, recipes to make, etc.)
5. Make food fun. Cut shapes out of fruit and dip in chocolate.
6. Make "surprises" for those you love (cakes, pictures, clean rooms)
7. Keep a journal.
8. Learn something new. (riding bike without training wheels, tae kwon do)
9. Be prepared and keep band-aids and first aid cream in your backpack.
10. Turn your owie into a badge of honor. Cole got a scratch on his forehead and thought it looked "cool" "like Harry Potter".


Little Boy Wisdom #70: Life is short, enjoy each day and make it fun for you and those you love.

Love is almost all you need...

The magical date when we could plant our garden seeds was fast approaching so Cole and I planned ahead. He said, “Plants need sun and rain and dirt and that’s it!” I added that they also need love. He smiled a funny lop-sided smile. I defended my position, “No really! You need to talk to them and show them you care by watering them every day.” So on Sunday, May 15th, one of the first nice days of spring, Noah woke up at 6:43 am and ran downstairs…”Mama!! Today’s the day! Let’s get out there and plant our garden!” He’s always been that way. Recently he said, “It’s a lovely day, why should we waste one minute.” I asked for just a few more minutes of sleep. Poor Noah did not come back however. Turned out he had the stomach flu and he would have to wait. Still Cole and I rushed out just after breakfast. He said, “I can’t believe this day is finally here! We waited all winter!” Noah sat on a lawn chair nearby with a heating pad on his tummy. He just couldn’t stay inside. His Daddy worked hard to turn the soil again and again so it would be ready for Noah to plant his carefully chosen seeds. Later in the day, he was able to plant his side of the garden as well, complete with marigolds staging the entrance to keep the bunnies from being tempted. At bedtime, when the sun was just beginning to set, Cole looked out his window at the golden light over the garden and said, in a voice just above a whisper, “Grow my beautiful garden, grow…” I guess he believed me above that love part. ☺ Little Boy Wisdom #69: Believe in the power of love to help us grow.

Climb Every Mountain

Cole and I were outside playing in the snow. Well, he was playing, I was shoveling. Suddenly, he ran inside to get something he said he needed. Quickly he emerged from the house carrying a big stick he had been "saving" since last fall. I asked him if he was planning on going for a walk with his stick. He said, "Nope, it's for mountain climbing." Next he began to dig his boots into the HUGE pile of snow in our front yard all the while using the stick as leverage. He made it to the top all by himself. When Noah came home, Cole asked him to claim the hill with him by placing their flag on top.

Little Boy Wisdom #68: When life brings new obstacles, don't be afraid. See them as a challenge and find something to help you climb over them.

Eyes

It's New Year's Day. I wake up and look in the mirror. I see the dark circles and the bags under my eyes, make up not quite washed off from the day before, more wrinkles than I remember last time I checked, and pale winter skin. I yawn, splash some water on my newly cleaned face, and go to find my boys playing legos. Cole looks at me and says, "Let me see your eyes, Mama." Kids are so brutally honest. I brace myself for some innocent kid comment about my aging face. "Open your eyes big." I comply. "Your eyes are a pretty blue like Sicily's." Sicily is our new Siamese kitten. It's kind of like that dirty window thing. I saw the wrinkles and bags, Cole looked through all that to see the pretty view.

Little Boy Wisdom #67: Look into people's eyes to see their spirit, not just their outward appearance.